shinkouchou: (Default)
I know I fall in love super easy and have my head in the clouds. But to be honest, most of the people I've liked up to now, I've known deep down that they weren't really right for me. I knew it was more of an infatuation than anything. And it frustrated me, because I have stupidly high standards for myself despite feeling that I'm not worthy of anyone (buh?)

But dammit, I've found someone who is so perfectly my ideal that it's not even funny. Our personalities are super similar. We have many of the same likes and habits. He's just the right age. He's smart. He's talented. He's handsome. He's sensitive. He's funny. He's just... as close to perfect for me as I think I'll ever find. And I can honestly say I'm not imagining all this.

But I have next to no chance. I know this. I'm realistic about this. I know I'm probably not what he's looking for at all. I know I'm just one tiny fish in the pond of girls who I'm sure adore him. But despite trying to talk myself out of it, out of falling for him, I haven't been able to.

Dammit. I don't like this feeling. I told myself no more of it...

If only I'd paid attention to him sooner.

Comments are off because I don't want to hear how I sound foolish and that I'm too unrealistic, etc. I know all this. I'm more writing this to get it off my chest and try to stop the same thing from swimming around my head.


shinkouchou: (Default)

October 2013

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